For some of you, the New Year brings a certain amount of anxiety. Anxiety about what you didn’t accomplish, what you didn’t have time for, what you should have done more of, and what you could have had. If you always experience feelings such as this, then there is one thing for certain; you may be losing sight of all of the possibilities that are right in front of you by always looking back at what could’ve been.
So how do you end up at this point? Why does the path of least resistance become the road most followed? Why not look ahead to what you know is out there for you and go for it?
In the book The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck, he writes, “Fearing the pain involved, almost all of us, to a greater or lesser degree, attempt to avoid problems. You procrastinate, hoping that they will go away. You ignore them, forget them, pretend they do not exist.” Now there’s an answer that we can all relate to on some level. We all have those things that hang over our head, that we put off until it’s too hard to do something about, or those things that we hope will just go away on its own, but never do. Whether big or small, these things ALL add up! And guess what? Looking back at them all the time will not get you any closer to what’s ahead of you. In fact, it may very well keep you in place or going backward.
Either way, some very important decisions need to be made before proceeding and the beginning of a New Year is a great time to set yourself up to receive the support you need.
So what’s the first step? As with any problem, we need to first determine if it is wiser to let go and keep moving forward or to go back and take care of the deeper cause once and for all. This is probably the hardest step because making a decision means you are ready for change. To move forward means that you are ready to let go of what’s behind you and to truly let go means that it will not consume you any longer. To go back and address a deeper issue means you are ready to heal this wound once and for all. Either way, it takes honesty and courage and it is an opportunity to learn from your mistakes and make the best of things.
M. Scott Peck further writes, “…let us teach ourselves and our children the necessity for [legitimate] suffering and the value thereof, the need to face problems directly and to experience the pain involved.” It is only when all of life’s experiences are felt, embraced and acknowledged wholeheartedly (instead of avoided) that you can truly work through life’s ups and downs successfully. You not only teach yourself to be solution oriented, but you teach yourself and your children the value of growing forward!
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